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Dear Thelma: I received my master's degree this month. Being an older, returning student, I didn't see the need at the time send out invitations to the graduation. That seemed more geared to the younger graduates. Now, I wish I had sent out something to share the news. Can I?

Answer: A printed graduation announcement is a great way to stay connected with family and friends and share your news. An announcement, as opposed to an invitation, is strictly what it says it is: an announcement of the accomplishment.

It is likely that your university has printed announcements available for you to purchase. These may have space in which you may neatly write your name and your degree. If the announcements are not designed with space for your name, you may have your own social card printed with your name and degree or you may write it by hand on a plain card and include it with the announcement. Send them as soon as possible.

Those receiving announcements are not obliged to send a gift. It would be appropriate to send a card of congratulations, but a gift is not expected.

Dear Thelma: Our daughter is getting married, and she and her fianc‚ need to restrict the number of people who attend the wedding and reception. Is it proper to send invitations to those who they really want to attend and announcements to other friends and not-so-close family? If so, should the announcements be sent after the wedding? They don't want it to look like they are just trying to get gifts from the uninvited. They truly want to share their good news, but cannot afford to have all of them at the festivities.

Answer: A wedding announcement is designed to do just what you're asking it to do. It is the best way to share the news with those you aren't able to include on the guest list.

The formality, style and wording of the announcement should match that of the invitations and include the date and place of the wedding. Replace the line that says "request the honor of your presence at the marriage of," with "have the honor of announcing the marriage of."

Unlike wedding invitations, announcements do not carry an expectation of gift-giving. Those who receive announcements may choose to send a gift, but they are never expected to. Sending a note or card of congratulations is proper.

Prepare the announcements for mailing before the wedding takes place so they are ready to send immediately after the event. You may have an attendant or friend mail them the day of the wedding or mail them yourself within a few days after the wedding.

Happy news and good manners never go out of style.